Friday Funnys


outdoinit's picture

Posts: 1009

Date Joined: 05/10/12

Hahahahaha, Just to funny..

Fri, 2014-05-23 07:30

 Love that first one.. 

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 I've spent half my life fishing.. The other half I have wasted.. 

crasny1's picture

Posts: 6985

Date Joined: 16/10/08

Mobile Phone trap

Fri, 2014-05-23 07:49

Ive answered someone talking on the phone with a headpiece on. Talk about the colour of red.

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"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk

opsrey's picture

Posts: 1200

Date Joined: 05/10/07

My mother used to say

Fri, 2014-05-23 09:06

 "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired" .... Took us years to work it out, if we didn't settle down or go somewhere soon we would be in line for a smack.

Alan James's picture

Posts: 2204

Date Joined: 30/06/09

...

Fri, 2014-05-23 09:18

 

 photo No_you_zps71959eb7.jpg

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crasny1's picture

Posts: 6985

Date Joined: 16/10/08

Not going anywhere there

Fri, 2014-05-23 13:08

LMAO.

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"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk

Colt_Striker's picture

Posts: 624

Date Joined: 26/07/09

Who's eating who??? PMSL

Fri, 2014-05-23 13:40

Who's eating who??? PMSL

A-SALT-WEAPON's picture

Posts: 103

Date Joined: 07/07/10

Here's some more

Fri, 2014-05-23 15:43

 


Phone rings, woman answers.

Pervert, breathing heavily, says,

"I bet you have a tight arse with no hair?"

Woman replies, "Yes, I have,

he's watching the football ... Who shall I say is calling?"



Water in the carburetor


WIFE: "There is trouble with the car. It has water in the carburettor."

HUSBAND: "Water in the carburettor? That's ridiculous "

WIFE: "I tell you the car has water in the carburettor."

HUSBAND: "You don't even know what a carburettor is. I'll check it out.
Where's the car?

WIFE: "In the pool"




THIS IS A FRIGHTENING STATISTIC, PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST WORRYSOME IN
RECENT YEARS.

25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness.

That's scary.

It means 75% are running around untreated.


HE MUST PAY

Husband and wife had a tiff. Wife called up her mom and said, "He fought
with me again, I am coming to live with you."

Mom said, "No darling, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to live with
you.



Today's Short Reading from the Bible...

From Genesis: "And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be
found in all corners of the earth."

Then He made the earth round...and He laughed and laughed and laughed!...

Posts: 315

Date Joined: 20/01/10

(No subject)

Fri, 2014-05-23 17:25

 Aaahh, there's lovely!

Posts: 193

Date Joined: 17/01/12

 now thats a classic!

Fri, 2014-05-23 22:38

 now thats a classic!

Faulkner Family's picture

Posts: 17835

Date Joined: 11/03/08

One day Adam was getting a

Fri, 2014-05-23 23:17

One day Adam was getting a bit amarous  , God spoke to him in a booming voice , You need to go see Eve.

Who is Eve adam asked. God explained to him who eve is.

 How do i find Eve , God replied, You need to go over the mountain , down through the valley and over the hill and you will see a cave and in that cave you will find Eve.

Adam all excited started running only to turn back within a few minuits to ake God what a mountain was, God explained what it is

Adam all excite took off running flat out up over the mountain and down the other side only to come to a sudden halt. He turned around and ran flat out to where ha came from to ask god what a valley is. God explained to him so off he goes again.

Adam runs flat out up over the mountain and down the other side and then along through the valley and came to a sudden halt again, By this time adam was getting a bit short of breath . Adam then sprinted back through the valley up over the mountain and down the other side to ask god what a hill was, God explained it to him once again.

Adam set off running flat out again up over the moountain and down the other side , down through the valley and up over the hill only to come to a sudden halt once more. Adam being extreemly short of breath after all this running waited a few moments before heading up over the hill , down through the valley up over the mopuntain and down the other side to ask another question of god.

What is a cave he asked. In the booming voice he explained what a cave was.

Adam exhausted as he was still had that feeling headed off once more. Up over the mountain and down the other side , along through the valley , up over the hill then into the cave to find Eve lying there totally naked other than a couple of vine leaves covering her private parts.

A few moments later Adam took off running flat out from the cave , up over the hill , down through the valley, up over the mountain and down the other side to speak to god once more. By this time he was exhausted but still managed to ask god , What on earth is a HEADACHE

 

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RUSS and SANDY. A family that fishes together stays together