Friday Funnys
Submitted by ledge64 on Fri, 2014-05-02 07:05
Enjoy 
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Paul H
Posts: 2104
Date Joined: 18/01/07
An old Doberman starts
An old Doberman starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.
The old Doberman thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep now!"
Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old Doberman exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"
Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.
"Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old Doberman nearly had me!"
Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.
The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.
The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and come see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"
Now, the old Doberman sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old Doberman says ....... "Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"
Moral of this story...
Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!
Bull Shit and brilliance only come with age and experience.
Youtube Channel - FishOnLine Productions
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbUVNa-ViyGm_FTDSv4Nqzg/videos
tim-o
Posts: 4657
Date Joined: 24/05/11
Hmmm, duno if junior gettin a
Hmmm, duno if junior gettin a tat is funny...Id like to use that tat gun on dads eyeballs
I am, as I've said, merely competent. But in an age of incompetence, that makes me extraordinary.
Versus
Posts: 918
Date Joined: 06/03/09
just when u think you've
just when u think you've seen it all...
crasny1
Posts: 7018
Date Joined: 16/10/08
Tim-o
for once I totally agree with you.
What a dick, and IT is a crime IMO.
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk
kirky79
Posts: 1364
Date Joined: 13/01/12
+1
+1
Shimka
Posts: 465
Date Joined: 06/02/14
+2Some people just need to
+2
Some people just need to be put down
Alan James
Posts: 2281
Date Joined: 30/06/09
...
Husband’s Message (by cell phone):
Honey, a car hit me while I was crossing the street. Paula brought me to the hospital.
They have been running tests and taking X-rays, but I think it’s bad.
I have recovered from the blow to my head; fortunately it seems that it may not have caused serious damage.
I have three broken ribs, a compound fracture of the left leg, and they may have to amputate the right foot.
Wife’s Response:
Who is Paula ?
sea-kem
Posts: 15202
Date Joined: 30/11/09
Ha ha ha yep, that about
Ha ha ha yep, that about sums a female up.
Love the West!
Alan James
Posts: 2281
Date Joined: 30/06/09
...
If you've ever worked for a boss who reacts before getting the facts and thinking things through, you will like this!
ABC Engineering Company, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO. The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers.
On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning against a wall.
The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business.
He asked the guy, "How much money do you make a week?"
A little surprised, the young man looked at him and said, "I make $400 a week. Why?"
The CEO said, "Wait right here."
He walked back to his office, came back in two minutes, and handed the guy $1,600 in cash and said, "Here's four weeks pay. Now GET OUT and don't come back."
Feeling pretty good about himself the CEO looked around the room and asked, "Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-ball did here?"
From across the room a voice said, "Pizza delivery guy from Domino's".
Dale
Posts: 7930
Date Joined: 13/09/05
Good stuff
Good stuff as always guys, particularly liked the old Doberman yarn.
cheers
Dale
"Just because you are a Character, Doesn't mean you have Character."
Mr Wolf
Jason D
Posts: 18
Date Joined: 22/10/12
That tat
has to be a photo shop job!
catchalittle
Posts: 1875
Date Joined: 04/09/08
(No subject)
Nathan
catchalittle
Posts: 1875
Date Joined: 04/09/08
(No subject)
Nathan
catchalittle
Posts: 1875
Date Joined: 04/09/08
(No subject)
Nathan
catchalittle
Posts: 1875
Date Joined: 04/09/08
(No subject)
Nathan
catchalittle
Posts: 1875
Date Joined: 04/09/08
women are like
Nathan
catchalittle
Posts: 1875
Date Joined: 04/09/08
(No subject)
Nathan
sea-kem
Posts: 15202
Date Joined: 30/11/09
Ha ha ha good one Nathan.
Ha ha ha good one Nathan.
Love the West!
bod
Posts: 2321
Date Joined: 03/05/06
(No subject)
chopdog
Posts: 68
Date Joined: 07/01/10
My Dad comes up to me and
My Dad comes up to me and says "son if you masturbate too much you'll go blind", I said "Dad, I'm over here"