A woman goes to the Doctor, worried about her husband's temper.
The Doctor asks: "What's the problem?"
The woman says: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every day my husband seems to lose his temper for no reason. It scares me."
The Doctor says: "I have a cure for that. When it seems that your husband is getting angry, just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow it until he either leaves the room or calms down."
Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.
The woman says: "Doctor that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband started losing it, I swished with water. I swished and swished, and he calmed right down! How does a glass of water do that?"
The Doctor says: "The water itself does nothing. It's keeping your mouth shut that does the trick."
I just received an audit on my tax return for 2013 back from the ATO. and it puzzles me!!! They are questioning how many dependents I claimed. I guess it was because of my response to the question: "List all your dependents?" I replied: 1million muslin immigrants we provide everything for; 50,000 crack heads in rehab ; 1 million unemployed people on the dole and not looking for work, 25,000 people in prison, 26,000 boat people who just arrived for a holiday , 535 persons in the Parliament and Senate with their nose in the trough "
They told me that this was NOT the correct answer. SO I KEEP ASKING MYSELF, WHO THE HELL DID I MISS?
A mate of mine took a Viagra once, didn't have any water to wash it down with and it ended up getting stuck in his throat...... poor bastard had a stiff neck for a week !!
I don't normally have a vent esp on Fridays Funnys that are sensational but... QANTAS really ...have spent over 4 hours on hold waiting to change flight details due to a medical condition ( middle ear infection) still no opportunity to speak with a consultant. Yeah I'm serious.... Skippy had gone bush.
crasny1
Posts: 6986
Date Joined: 16/10/08
Huh
I suspect there is a problem with loading images as others have had issues
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk
groverwa
Posts: 286
Date Joined: 21/07/14
A woman goes to the Doctor,
A woman goes to the Doctor, worried about her husband's temper.
The Doctor asks: "What's the problem?"
The woman says: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every day my husband seems to lose his temper for no reason. It scares me."
The Doctor says: "I have a cure for that. When it seems that your husband is getting angry, just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow it until he either leaves the room or calms down."
Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.
The woman says: "Doctor that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband started losing it, I swished with water. I swished and swished, and he calmed right down! How does a glass of water do that?"
The Doctor says: "The water itself does nothing. It's keeping your mouth shut that does the trick."
groverwa
Posts: 286
Date Joined: 21/07/14
Making pork
Making pork sausages
https://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/k1bG2EPGmI0?autoplay=1&vq=hd720&rel=0&showinfo=0&start=82&end=321
Dale
Posts: 7930
Date Joined: 13/09/05
On a grim day, this has given me a good laugh.
"Just because you are a Character, Doesn't mean you have Character."
Mr Wolf
crasny1
Posts: 6986
Date Joined: 16/10/08
Leon Schuster from South Africa is similarly funny
Just one of his pranks
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ulHi3bxBcw8
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk
Willlo
Posts: 1490
Date Joined: 07/10/11
Classic ,just goes to show
Classic ,just goes to show tho people are happy to eat meat as long as they don't have to witness the process lol.
Call Sign - BZ785
Haynes Hunter Prowler CC
groverwa
Posts: 286
Date Joined: 21/07/14
I just received an audit on
I just received an audit on my tax return for 2013 back from the ATO. and it puzzles me!!!
They are questioning how many dependents I claimed.
I guess it was because of my response to the question: "List all your dependents?"
I replied: 1million muslin immigrants we provide everything for; 50,000 crack heads in rehab ;
1 million unemployed people on the dole and not looking for work,
25,000 people in prison, 26,000 boat people who just arrived for a holiday , 535 persons in the Parliament and Senate with their nose in the trough "
SO I KEEP ASKING MYSELF, WHO THE HELL DID I MISS?
Bones 79
Posts: 121
Date Joined: 12/02/14
groverwa
Posts: 286
Date Joined: 21/07/14
and last one
Taking Viagra wont turn you into Sean Connery
Adam Gallash
Posts: 15610
Date Joined: 29/11/05
Pics
Not sure what is going on with the pics, will have a look when I get home today.
Site Admin - Just ask if you need assistance
Krusty
Posts: 714
Date Joined: 27/11/15
One more
A mate of mine took a Viagra once, didn't have any water to wash it down with and it ended up getting stuck in his throat...... poor bastard had a stiff neck for a week !!
My fishing spots are so secret........... even the fish don't know where they are !!
Perry Home
Posts: 434
Date Joined: 07/10/10
Qantas... joke of the day
I don't normally have a vent esp on Fridays Funnys that are sensational but... QANTAS really ...have spent over 4 hours on hold waiting to change flight details due to a medical condition ( middle ear infection) still no opportunity to speak with a consultant. Yeah I'm serious.... Skippy had gone bush.