**Diary of a Karratha Summer (by a Pom****)**
>
> *August 31st*
>
> *Just got transferred with work into our new home in Karratha,
> Western Australia now this is a town that knows how to live!!
> Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place! I
> watched the sunset from a deck chair on the verandah It was
> beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.*
>
> *September 13th:*
>
> *Really heating up. Got to 35 today. Not a problem. Live in an
> air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure
> to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun
> worshiper.*
>
> *September 30th:*
>
> *Had the backyard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of
> palms and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing lawn for
> me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.*
>
> *October 10th*
>
> *The temperature hasn't been below 35 all week. How do people get
> used to this kind of heat? At least today it's kind of windy though.
> But getting used to the heat is taking longer than I expected.*
>
> *October 15th:*
>
> *Fell asleep by the pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body.
> Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson
> though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.*
>
> *October 20th:*
>
> *I missed Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this
> morning. By the time I got to the hot car for lunch, Kitty had died
> and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stank up the $3,000
> leather upholstery. I told the kids that she ran away. The car now
> smells like Wiskettes and cat sh*t. I learned my lesson though.
>No
> more pets in this heat.*
>
> *October 25th:*
>
> *The wind sucks. It feels like a giant f**kin blow dryer!! And it's
> hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the blink and the AC
> repairman charged $200 just to drive over and tell me he needed to
> order parts.*
>
> *October 30th:*
>
> *Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. Bloody
> $600,000 house and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever come
> here?*
>
> *November 4th:*
>
> *It's 38 degrees. Finally got the ol' air-conditioner fixed today.
> It cost $1,500 and gets the temperature down to 25, but the bloody
> humidity makes the house feel like it's about 30. Stupid repairman.
> I hate this stupid f**kin place.** *
>
> *November 8th:*
>
> *If another wise arse cracks, "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going
> to f**kin throttle him. F**kin heat! By the time I get to work the
> car's radiator was boiling over, my clothes are soakin f**kin wet,
> and I smell like baked cat!!*
>
> *November 9th:*
>
> *Tried to run some messages after work. Wore shorts, and sat on the
> black leather seats in the ol' car. I thought my f**kin arse was
> on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my
> legs and my f**kin arse. Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried
> arse, and baked cat.*
>
> *November 10th:*
>
> *The weather report might as well be a f**kin recording. Hot and
> sunny. Hot and sunny. Hot and f**kin sunny. It's been too hot to
> do anything for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it might
> really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this damn f**kin
> place? Water rationing will be next, so my $5,000 worth of palms
> just might dry up and blow into the f**kin pool. Even the palms
> can't live in this f*kin heat.*
>
> *November 14th:*
>
> *Welcome to HELL!!! Temperature got to 41 today. Now the
> air-conditioner's gone in my car. The repairman came to fix it and
> said, "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend the $2,500
> mortgage payment to bail my arse out of jail for assulting the
> stupid f**ker. F**k Karratha! What kind of a sick demented f**kin
> idiot would want to live here?*
>
> *December 1st:*
>
> *WHAT????? This is the first day of Summer???? You are f**kin
> kiddin*